Whereupon I Tell You I Continue to be a Druggie

Lotsa veggies on this diet. Lots!

Yes, I'm still in the land of the living.  Four years ago this month I would never have believed I would still be here today.  It was four years ago I underwent debulking surgery for ovarian cancer.  "Debulking" means exactly that...the surgeon removed the bulk or 95 percent of the cancer within my abdomen. And since it was still confined to the abdomen and a couple lymph nodes I was staged at III-C...meaning the cancer had not yet spread (metastasized) to other parts of the body.

So here I am, four years later, still doing one chemo drug after another, with each dropping my tumor marker (CA-125) a few notches before it begins rising again.  Right now I am on oral hexalen but that may be short-lived and I may be going on my eighth (8th!) chemo regimen soon.

Just call me a druggie.  I consume one drug after another. The only meds I refuse to take are pain meds. Because, frankly, I haven't needed them. Amazingly!

Anyway...I belong to an online forum of several hundred other ovarian patients.  And on that forum are a few members who are working with a naturopathic doctor in addition to their medical team.   Some of them have attained stability or even remission.  Maybe they would have anyway, I don't know, but I decided I would try what they are trying.

My bedside table after tidying it up.

So two weeks ago I flew 900 miles to meet with several other ovarians, and the naturopath.  Each of us has a treatment plan specific to our own condition...based on a myriad of blood tests (some of which insurance did not cover!).  The idea is to enhance the immuno system so the body can do its best to discourage continued cancer growth.

Along with various supplements I am going to spend a few months following a very low carb diet.  No dairy. No grains. No grain-fed meat.  Organic and grass-fed.

My family doc is interested in seeing how I do on this regimen. My Oncologist just shook his head.  On the other hand, he was agreeable to letting me have a PET/CT scan sometime this month...so....here we go.

In other news...which is not really news...I spent a few minutes this morning tidying my bedside table. I had it so piled high with books that I was afraid I would have a book landslide any moment. You've probably guessed I read in bed.

Another thing that is keeping me busy these days is Sunday School. I'm teaching a group of nine high school boys and girls.  I can't tell you how much I like these kids!  And they seem to like me right back.  I'm hitting them hard with lots of questions as we read through the Gospel of John.  Hey! The first 5 verses of chapter 1 are astounding!  And that's where we began. Chapters 6 and 10 are favorites of mine because they hold key verses so essential to any Christian...sadly, many Christians are unaware of these two chapters.

Specifically, John 6:37-40 and John 6:44-45.
And specifically, John  10:27-30.
(If you hover your cursor over the scriptures, they should pop up in a little window.)

To sum up...hubby and I are doing well (all things considered).  And we continue to have joy in our faith and in the promises of scripture.

May you be blessed this day.
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Whereupon I Tell You that Lillian Loved Laughter and Lilacs

Once upon a time Hubby and I lived in California in a small rural community.  Each Sunday we drove 12 miles "up the hill" to the town where we went to church.  On the way we often picked up Lillian who resided at an assisted care facility, a small rural home where six to ten elderly persons resided.  
Hubby and I met Lillian when one of the deacons of our church asked if we could pick her up on our way to church. Lillian was a dear woman and always ready to engage in conversation. She enjoyed sitting up front with Hubby and delighted us with her sweet spirit and alert mind and ready smile. Her smile was as wide as an ocean and always genuine.  She loved going to church. We loved taking her.   
Lillian loved flowers and especially lilacs.  A couple months after she died I had a dream about her. I wrote it down in the form of a poem. I'm so glad I did for I fear I would have forgotten the sweetness of this dream had I not done so.

Sweet Lillian

I dreamt of Sweet Lillian.

She said she saw lilacs in the sky.

I thought her words strange

   that she misspoke

   or saw things that were not there.

Yet she laughed

   with that wide laugh of her youth.

So I looked to see

   what made her throw back her head

   in wide display of laughter,

And there

   spread across the blue-lavender sky

   were lilacs in full bloom

   soft canopy of lavender blue.

In delight

   I joined my grateful laughter with hers.

Sweet Lillian.

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Whereupon I Avoided Dozens of Flat Tires and Got Felled By Roadkill

Remember in July when I reported saving my neighbors countless flat tires?  On my daily walks I pick up nails off the street...lots of nails.  I save them in a jar and I showed them to you in July.  One of these days I'm going to take that jar down to the city office and tell them the street sweeper needs to sweep more often!

In the meantime...I keep walking...and I keep finding nails.

But this week, driving on brand new tires one of the tires began losing air.  We took it to the dealer who presented us this little bit of animal bone as souvenir. Even though we had not directly hit a "roadkill" our car has straddled many this fall. Lots of raccoon and skunks didn't make it safely across the highway.  And one of those little beasties, with his sensibilities (and bits of bone) scattered across the road, managed to snag one of our new tires!

Along with the souvenir the dealer presented us with a repair bill.  At least the poor little beastie didn't kill the tire completely and we were fortunate to pay only for repair and not a brand-new tire. Yet. We pray it holds.

Who would think!

Could He Have Failed? I Don't Think So. And Scripture Backs Me Up!

Recently I visited a Christian blog that was reviewing a book by a noted theologian.  No, I am not going to name the book...suffice it to say that one of the chapters began with a statement in regard to the temptation of Christ (wherein Satan offered him the kingdoms of the world if Jesus would only bow down to him).   

Now I want to say that I have not read the rest of this book and am not going to name the book.  You can find it easily enough if you google portions of the following sentences therein.

The topic of the book is "how to deal with temptations" (or at least that's what I got from the review).  The author used the following  impossible scenario as an intro.  

"If Jesus had accepted it (the devil's offer of the kingdoms of the world) Satan would have surrendered his reign of terror.  Jesus could have directed the kingdoms of the world however he wanted.  No more babies would be miscarried. No more women would die in childbirth. Ended immediately would be all human slavery, all genocide, all disease, all poverty, all torture, and all ecological catastrophes."

This scenario IS IMPOSSIBLE, theologically speaking. 

The author's premise of what might have transpired IF Jesus HAD accepted Satan's offer is true only IF following are true:

1. ...if Satan is NOT a liar and can (or even will) deliver what he promises. 
2. ...only if Satan is willing to forego the TOTAL destruction of humankind, sinners or no, and allow man to live in "earthly" peace once Jesus stepped back from his appointed, fore-ordained, all-empowered work.
3. ...ONLY if Satan has full power over the things of this world. We know that he does not (Job Chapter 1).  He can do only so far as God allows. There is nothing in the Bible that infers Satan has full control over earthly matters, including kingdoms, neither then nor now. God is the One who sets up and tears down.  Yes, Satan works and works mightily. My point is that the kingdoms were not HIS to GIVE!
4. Lastly, it is true only if it were POSSIBLE for God's ordained plan of salvation to fail. God is all-powerful. What He ordains, He brings about. And He ordained that the Son would not fail.

None of these four prerequisites is possible. NONE!

Could Jesus have failed? Could He have yielded to Satan's temptations?  Let's take a look at what Scripture tells us.

• Luke 22:22 "For indeed, the Son of Man is going as it has been determined.."

• Acts 2:23  "this man, delivered over by the predetermined plan and foreknowledge  of God, you (men of Israel vs.. 22) nailed to a cross by the hands of godless men and put him to death." 

• Acts 3:18 "But the things which God announced beforehand by the mouth of all the prophets, that His Christ would suffer, He has thus fulfilled.

• Acts 4:28 "...to do whatever Your hand and Your purpose predestined to occur." 

• Acts 10:42 "...this is the One who has been appointed by God a Judge of the living and the dead."

• Acts 17:31  "He has fixed a day in which He will judge the world in righteousness through a Man whom He has appointed, having furnished proof to all men by raising Him from the dead."

What God ordains He brings about.  He does NOT TRY something only to have it fail.  He sent the Son into the world, knowing that what He planned the Son would accomplish.  It was foreordained (ordered from the beginning) and predestined (destined to happen exactly as ordained).

To think anything less is to question the complete sovereignty of God and to denigrate His redemptive power to nothing.

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Ears That Hear

September is Ovarian Cancer Awareness Month.  Every woman knows about breast cancer.  Very few know the  symptoms of ovarian. Last month I was a guest blogger at the Scope Blog published by the Stanford School of Medicine. I've printed my column almost in its entirety.  Please read on.

Several years ago we moved back to the Midwest, and I needed to find a family physician. I opted for a female doctor, hoping that as a woman she might be more tuned to my aging female body and to its potential health problems. Potential, I say, because I thought I was in good health.  (Disclaimer...my new doctor was practicing in the Bigger City, not here in our hometown.)

I liked my new doctor and enjoyed my annual physicals and other visits. But looking back, I wish she would have listened more closely to my seemingly minor complaints. I may have been ignorant about the subtle and near-silent symptoms of ovarian cancer, including rib pain and the frequent need to urinate, day and night, but my doctor should have known. I expected her to know.

It was in 2007 when I first mentioned nightly pain under the edge of my bottom right rib.   I told my Doc I couldn’t sleep on my right side. Six months later I mentioned it again, and in late 2008 I once more mentioned the nagging discomfort. During that visit my doctor did a two-second rectovaginal pelvic examination and, as part of my physical, a full blood work-up. The results were still at the lab so before I left I asked her to send me a print-out.
 
Several days later my blood results arrived in the mail. Three pages. At the top of the first page my doctor had written, “Looks great!” endorsed by an inked smiley face. I casually scanned down the first page. Everything looked normal. But when I got to the third page I noticed my alkaline phosphatase reading was abnormally high, and I did what any normal person does these days: I Googled. Possibilities included problems with the gall bladder or liver and that dastardly word “cancer.” (Note! Always ask for copies of blood labs and other tests and read them.)

Naturally, I opted to think it was a gall bladder problem and asked for an ultrasound, which showed a large gallstone that I went in to get removed. 

My gall bladder surgeon was the one to give me the bad news. As I came out from under the anesthesia, his face swirled in the white light above me while he told me he had found cancer in my abdomen and on my liver (right where I had been experiencing pain). I remember distinctly the photos he showed me. Still under the influence of anesthesia, I replied quietly, “That is not good news.”

Fortunately for me, my surgeon referred me to a Gyno/Onc who debulked me, removed 95 percent of the cancer, tied my intestines into little “animal balloons” (I jest only slightly), returned them to my ab cavity and put me back together with 43 metal staples. I had just endured the “mother of all surgeries.” It was a brutal surgery but without it I would be long dead. The official diagnosis was ovarian cancer (stage III-C), and chemo followed. And followed. And followed.

Three and a half years later, I’m on my 5th chemo regimen. All things considered I’m doing fairly well: I lead an active life, do some volunteer work, take care of my home. I’m grateful to be alive. (Yes, I've been bald. Three Times!)

But I can’t help but think that if my doctor had listened more closely, more sharply, with “ears that hear,” to my ongoing complaints about rib pain, or if she had provided me with a simple informational brochure so I would been more knowledgeable, perhaps I would have been diagnosed long before Stage III-C.  

Every woman knows about breast cancer. But very few know about the symptoms or diagnostic tests associated with ovarian cancer – which could be why most of us are diagnosed late in the game, when statistics for survival are grim. Awareness is the most important piece of diagnosis – awareness by both the medical professional and the patient – and so I ask doctors to educate themselves and their patients about this deadly cancer.

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Perhaps it was unfair, but I "fired" that female doctor. Now I work with a family practitioner in our small town.  He watches over my overall health and follows my progress (or lack of it) in regards to my chemo. I like it that he's one of my neighbors and now and then I catch a glimpse of him riding his bicycle home after a long day at the clinic. Without using his hands on the handlebars!  Yikes! I like it even more when he takes the time to sit and really listen as we discuss what is going on in my "health".  

And those "silent symptoms" of ovarian cancer?  They can be easily mistaken for digestive and other problems.  But if symptoms are persistent, YOU be persistent with your Doc. Symptoms can include:

• Bloating
• Pelvic or abdominal pain (including under the bottom right rib)
• Trouble eating or feeling full quickly
• Need to urinate urgently or often (day and/or night)
• Fatigue
• Upset stomach or heartburn
• Back pain
• Pain during sex
• Constipation
• Menstrual changes
• (in my case, a mild anemia with no known cause)

If symptoms persist daily for more than two weeks the National Ovarian Cancer Coalition advises you to ask your physician for a combination pelvic/rectal exam, transvaginal ultrasound, and CA-125 blood test.  Tell 'em I sent ya.

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Betcha Never Found Anything Like This While Out Walking!

Remember when I mentioned saving lotsa folks from having flat tires...by picking up stray nails during my walks around town?   Well, look what I found this week.  I believe these are blanks from a starter gun.  There were originally ten bullets.  I found only nine.  The nail was found during the same walk.

It didn't seem like a good idea to leave them in the street.  They would make an awful pop if someone ran over them in such a way that they might "fire".

And it didn't seem like a good idea to toss them in the garbage either!  Just think of the garbage truck exploding the caps as the truck compressed my garbage bag!

So I took them to the local police station and let them deal with the disposal.

Betcha never found anything like that on any of YOUR walks, now have ya!

Spaghetti On the Floor? Or How I Recycle an Electric Blanket

Aww, it only LOOKS like spaghetti.

These strands are the wires pulled from a non-functioning twin-size electric blanket.  The blanket was in good condition, less than a year old, but the "electric" part quit working.  (I would think electric blankets should last more than a year...but, whatever!!!)

I discovered it's a simple task to snip around the connecting unit, then begin pulling wires. When I could pull no more, I cut the wire and found another to pull. It took several efforts to get at all the wires. The finishing touch was to stitch down the cut area and toss it into the washing machine.  

(Don't use your best sewing scissors to snip wires...find the clutzy pair that resides in your handy-dandy tool box.)

Next month this "new" upcycled cream-colored blanket, freshly laundered, will go on our church's "free" garage sale.  Hopefully, some child will be a bit warmer this winter. 

The "spaghetti" went in the trash.  I suppose I could recycle the copper but I don't know where. And the wire is so tiny, I don't think it's worth a lot to anyone. 

Nonetheless...if someone sets up mining operations someday in our landfills in order to harvest the metals we have tossed away, perhaps these wires will contribute to future recycling.  *smile*
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